Another Revolution Around the Sun
Last week I turned 33 - AKA: a "master number", Jesus' age when he died, the highest level one can obtain in the Freemasons, the number of vertebrae in the human spine, the revolution speed of some vinyl lp's (actually 33 1/2 to be technical), hell - there's even a weird "Club 33" in Disneyland where you can pay $40k to be a baller with Mickey. But enough random-ass facts about this number onto what I'm thinking about on this revolution around the sun.
Each year, my birthday is a time for me to check in with myself and see where I'm at. It's not so much that I'm thinking of resolutions like I do on New Year's, but it's more like I think along the lines of life themes I'm working on currently. Over the past few months, I've found myself naturally drawing inward and focusing on self care. I've been consciously trying to let go of thoughts, habits, food - even people that no longer serve me.
First off, I've documented my constant striving to be in shape and ways to lose a few pounds, but recently by approach to health has really changed. The goal for me has shifted from being obsessed with how I look, to more of how I feel. Also, I'm thinking more about long term health instead of the instant gratification that comes from addictive foods like Nutella donuts. Disclaimer here right away: fitting into my smaller clothes has made me giddy and cheat meals/days DO HAPPEN. So what am I doing? I'm trying to follow the guidelines of BLE Eating. It's quite detailed to get into here, but I highly recommend the book to learn more. (Side note - I will do a more detailed post about my experience with BLE in the future.) As far as exercising goes, BLE doesn't require it, nor does it completely prohibit it. I have stopped running for now for my bad knee's sake (again, long term thinking here). It doesn't mean I won't get back into running again though. Instead, I've focused on practicing yoga around three times a week and that makes me very happy and sane here in NY.
As I briefly mentioned before, I'm also finding myself letting go of social situations that no longer serve me, specifically toxic people. A "toxic" person is an individual that makes you feel shitty after every interaction with them. In my experience, after spending time with this type of person, I'll know that they're "toxic" for me if I am completely drained and exhausted once I'm home away from them. Fittingly, these people are also known as "energy vampires". Interestingly, another thing I've noticed is that I'll also have a tight, uneasy stomach during my time with them, like my gut is reeling from this person just as it would when digesting food that is not good for my system. I've found that cutting these people out of my life is hard, especially if they're being manipulative and I don't even realize it. I've also had to concede that some people are difficult to completely disassociate from. This has become a great lesson in communicating boundaries. It's an exercise in self care that I'm constantly working on.
In addition to cleaning up my interactions with people, I'm also really trying to clean up my home environment. Being married to a Virgo, I get a ton of help in this area. I've been getting rid of physical things that no longer serve me, whether it's getting rid of clothes that are now too big (yay!) or old musty papers I've had since college. We've also switched around a few rooms of the apartment, including the bedroom, to make it cozier. We've also reclaimed our space by closing off the bedroom and adding a door since the cats had completely taken over the apartment (cats have a certain way of becoming in charge of a house, right!?) I wouldn't call it feng shui exactly, but more like making our space work for us. I'm beginning to think the "Clean space, clear mind." phrase is really true for me.
Actually, the aforementioned phrase brings me to the main outcome of incorporating these 3 themes: clarity. For the first time in a long time, it's actually easier now to make decisions -everything from what to eat for dinner to bigger life decisions such as what goals to pursue in the upcoming year. I've never been more excited to pare down facets of my life to move forward!